Our Grandchild

We joke all the time that we are raising two kids and a grandchild.  Of course, Jessie is not our grandchild.  It just feels that way.  Joelan is 13 and Julia is a month from turning 11.  We were in our prime when they were toddlers.  We had endless energy and I had read every parenting book available so I was and expert on discipline, potty training,  and character development (ha,ha).    Our older children are in what is called the “golden years of parenting”.  We survived the terrible twos, and threes for that matter, and both kids had learned to read.  We had diapers, potty training and spankings behind us and were enjoying sleeping in on Saturdays.

Well God blessed us with our third child when I was considered “advanced maternal age” (37).  I was not emotionally prepared for this pregnancy and it took all 40 weeks of it to get pumped up for her arrival.   Jesslyn came into the world and had to adapt quickly to life with two older, baseball/softball loving siblings.  She was 6 days old when she attended her first softball game.  We all four instantly fell in love with this incredibly spirited, beautiful baby.

So people ask us all of the time what it is like having a baby again.    It is very different.  I had Joelan and Julia on schedules and would never plan anything to do that would interrupt their naps.  We have to wake Jessie up regularly to take Julia to piano or Joelan to a baseball game.  She lives at the ball park during the Spring.

So Jessie is approaching 2 years old and I am gearing up.  I have been through 2 twice.  I know what it entails.  I hope I have the energy to make it and do it well.  Moms don’t get enough credit for the endless hours it takes to discipline and nurture a toddler.  I am looking to my younger and more structured friends to support me during this time.   I used to be like you.  But I forgot how to do it.  Better pull out those parenting books again!

Direct your children onto the right path, and when they are older, they will not leave it,  Proverbs 22:6

And that is my son?

Jonathan and I take all of the responsibility.  He was our first and we were clueless.  The first few years of his life were very interesting to say the least.  He was painfully shy, extremely sensitive and exhaustingly inquisitive.  It took 45 minutes to get him dressed sometimes.  The shirts itched and the socks had knots….what is a mother to do?

I remember thinking to myself, “He is not like me.  He is not like Jonathan.  Where did he come from?”

In a bible study one morning, the speaker challenged the congregation to accept ourselves the way God made us.  I felt like God was telling me that morning to accept our son the way He made him.  He was made for God’s purposes here on earth.

He is 13 now.  God is doing a great work in my son and Tuesday he and his buddy gave the talk at Campus Life.  Are you kidding me?  My son who would cover his eyes if anyone spoke to him is now speaking about Christ in front of his peers?

The verse I claimed for Joelan as a baby is this:  “Now I’m turning you over to God, our marvelous God whose gracious Word can make you into what he wants you to be and give you everything you could possibly need in this community of holy friends.”  Acts 20:32

God, please continue to show me how to love my children and train them to be your servants.

Where He leads, I will go

Not too long ago I heard some terrible news.  One of the boy’s mom from Joelan’s baseball team was diagnosed with a brain tumor and had to have emergency surgery to have it removed.  This woman and I had exchanged smiles and waves and our toddler daughters had shared a few french fries together at the baseball games, but I really didn’t know her.  For some reason I felt compelled by the Spirit of God to visit her at Gwinnett Medical.  I made plans to see her the next day and prayed as I walked to her room that God would give me the words to say to her.  She seemed to be expecting me when I arrived to her room.  We talked, cried and prayed and I left encouraging her to cling to God.

She and her family visited our church a couple of Sundays later.  By this time she had received the news that the cancer was all over her body and she was not expected to live much longer.  Again, the Spirit told me to pursue her.  I called her that week and told her that I knew it was weird but that I felt that I couldn’t rest until we talked.  We arranged to meet and she told me that when we got together, she would tell me why I had that feeling.

When I arrived at her house that November morning, she told me that the day she received the news or her diagnosis, she immediately felt the urge to talk with me or Jonathan.  She needed peace and she felt like we could help her settle some of her questions.  We talked that day about eternity, salvation, answered prayers and making the most of every minute we have on earth.  We talked about forgiveness and security and allowing God to take control of our lives.

Six months later, Beth is still in the fight of her life against cancer.  God is answering our prayers and the treatment is working.  Please check out the video that was shared at church on Mother’s Day. 

The Best 30 Minutes

Today I stopped by the library to pick up a book that I had on reserve.  Jessie was with me so we breezed into the children’s section and I noticed that storytime was about to begin.  Wow.  Story time.  Jessie would probably like this.  But I have a million things to do and I would really like to get home and get a shower before my lunch appointment.  She is too young to know what she is missing, right? In a split second I made the decision to stay and we had a seat with the other moms and kids.  What happened next was the most wonderful 30 minutes that I had spent in a long time.  Jessie absolutely loved the storyteller and the books she chose.  It was “Make some Noise” day which worked out perfectly because Jessie knows how to do that!  We made animal noises and then played instruments and danced.   I smiled the whole time and wondered if every mom there thought that their child was the cutest and smartest child in the world because that was exactly what I was thinking.

Choices.  Each day we have to make hundreds.  Today I chose to spend 30 minutes with the most precious 2 year old.  I am so glad I did.

Miley Can’t Be Tamed

So I just watched the new Miley Cyrus video, Can’t Be Tamed.  Well I can’t say I am shocked.  A little disappointed maybe, but it seems like all of the wholesome, teenage stars eventually head in a different direction.  What really came to mind as I watched the video was the conversation that Julia and I will have when we sit down and watch this together.  Julia isn’t a huge fan of Miley’s, but we have seen every episode of Hannah Montana and both movies Miley was in.  I think I will ask Julia questions like, “What did you like about the video?  What did you not like about the video? What do you think God would say about the video?”

You see, I don’t want to tell Julia what to think.  At the same time, I want her to be open to sharing with me her opinions so we can talk about her thoughts.  I also hope she asks me what I think about it.  If she does, I will tell her that I think that God loves creativity and he gave each person special talents.  I will tell her that I think Miley is extremely talented and that the video was captivating. I will say that I thought it was very sensual and that the dancing in the video was inappropriate behavior for someone that claims to love Christ.  I will also talk about how God wants his children to glorify Him in all that they do.  Anytime a christian is faced with a difficult choice, she should ask herself, “Can I bring glory to God by doing this?”

Are you having this type of open dialogue with your kids?  Do you talk about current events and the media influencers in their lives?  Mom and Dad….we have to stay 2 steps ahead of our kids, so don’t tune out.  Stay connected.  You are the key ingredient in helping shape your child’s worldview.  Don’t miss it!

Don’t you realize that your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit, who lives in you and was given to you by God? You do not belong to yourself, ²⁰ for God bought you with a high price. So you must honor God with your body.  I Corinthians 6:19-20

Tribute to my mom

Every year mother’s day comes around and it seems as if I say the same thing to mom as I did the year before.  Why is it difficult for me to put into words the amount of love and respect I have for my mother?  When I look back and think about the immense amount of time and energy she put into raising my sister and me, I am overwhelmed with gratitude.  My mom is the prettiest and youngest looking 62-year-old woman in the world.  That is plain to see to everyone around.  If I had a dollar for every time someone asked me, “Is that your mother?  How old is she?  She looks more like your sister.”, I would be rich!  But beauty is only skin deep.  What I love most about her is her character.

My mom is a hard worker.  She can do anything she sets her mind to.

My mom is a devoted wife.  She has served in ministry alongside my dad through the good times and bad for 43 years.

My mom loves her grandchildren.  I don’t think there could be a Grammy who loves her grandchildren more than she loves her 6.

My mom loves Jesus.  She dedicated her life to Him and has lived it for over 50 years.

My mom disciplined my sister and I with love, consistency and without compromise.  She taught me how to respect authority and I believe her faithfulness to do so protected me from many stupid activities I could have gotten involved in.

My mom told me to be the leader God had designed me to be.  In her eyes, I will never fail.  That is what every daughter needs to know from her mom.

And there is another mom in my life now.  When I married Jonathan, I became a daughter-in-law to an incredible woman.  She loves me and accepted me from the first time I met her.

The lists could go on, but I will save some of my thoughts for another day.

So to these two women in my life, I love you!  And to them and all of those who are mothers, Happy Mother’s Day!

This is a picture of my parents and their grandchildren from last summer.

A little love to the teachers….

Ok…how many of you moms out there dread the month of May like I do?  The calendar is SO full with baseball and  softball games, guitar recitals, chorus concerts, end of the year school parties and to add to my plate, I volunteered to head up the teacher appreciation committee for the middle school.  Jonathan keeps asking me if any of the goodies around the house are for him.  I have told him that they are for the teachers and he keeps saying that he is a teacher of the Word so he should get something…..

And while on the topic of teachers, perhaps the best kindergarten teacher in the world is Kay Johnson.  We met Kay when we first moved to Georgia and I immediately was drawn to her gentleness and kindness.  My daughter Julia was blessed to be in her class the next year.  Kay never tired of loving the kids in her class and the entire hallway and classroom were filled with art projects that the children made throughout the year.  The kids sang with her everyday.  She made individualized word envelopes with sight words to fit each child’s ability level.  At Christmas time, she got the kids 3 feet long stocking that were filled to the brim with goodies.  Julia  had her tonsils taken out that year and Kay brought over ice cream and presents.  One night, she even had a sleep over at the school for the kids…talk about dedication.  Kay had all of the children bring her their ball schedules and she would attend their games.  At the end of the year, the children preformed a play for the parents that was magical.  My daughter fell in love with Mrs. Johnson and never wanted to leave kindergarten.  Kay taught for 30 years.  Imagine the difference she made in the lives of hundreds of children.  Now during her retirement years she continues to spend her time loving children and volunteering.

Mrs. Johnson is one of the many fabulous teachers our kids have had over the years.  In honor of our teachers, let me just express some gratitude.

For the countless times you put aside your own needs in order to comfort the student whose parents are divorcing…thank you.

For the many ways you go the extra mile and strive to make learning fun…thank you.

For the hours you have spent pondering the most effective ways to teach children to read…thank you.

For the creative ideas you have implemented to motivate the kids to behave well…thank you.

For the positive words and feelings you have expressed to children to build up their self esteem…thank you.

I would say that only the Lord knows the full impact of your service over the years.  Teacher, your reward is in heaven.  You are making a difference for all eternity.  Thank you.

Mommy Guilt

It doesn’t matter what I do, I somehow always feel guilty.  I have an idea of what a perfect mother is…and I am definitely not it!  When Joelan was born, I was a full time stay-at-home mom.  Today, 13 years later, I am a mother of 3 and work full time.  I suffer from mommy guilt on a regular basis.  I have my to do list swimming in my head at all times and at the end of the day, I ponder over all of the things that did not get done.  Do you know what I thought about this morning on my way to work?  Will I be able to cook a home cooked meal any night this week?  How come we are never home for dinner? No wonder one of Jessie’s first words was “fries”.  What are the possible long term effects of a toddler loving fries?  I didn’t grow up this way.  My mother cooked every night but Thursday when we went to Sizzler.

Mommy Guilt.  A definite lie used to discourage me from being all God wants me to be today.

So today I am going to continue figuring out what God’s calling is for me during this season of my life.  I am going to embrace my various roles and not let the devil get me on that guilt trip.

“My grace is all you need. My power works best in weakness.” So now I am glad to boast about my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ can work through me. 2 Corinthians 12:9

Will anyone read this?

I have made fun of Jonathan for 2 years now…I told him that blogs were self-indulgent and asked him repeatedly why anyone would want to know what he was thinking or doing each day…So this morning when I asked him if he thought anyone would read a blog that I wrote, he chuckled and responded, “Your mom would”.

So for what it is worth, I am going to begin to “blog” about the thoughts that go through my mind each day as I attempt to wholeheartedly love Jesus and be the parent and wife He is calling me to be.   It is my desire that the people God has placed under our care at Graystone Church will become all that God wants them to be…and that in some small way, my thoughts and experiences will help them have stronger families.